It’s officially the last minute and probably too late to special order any awesome derby stuff for the derby girl in your life. I suppose you could neatly wrap up the invoice, and that will provide a thrill, on paper, but there’s plenty of other things derby girls need and appreciate and most are available in a strip mall near you.
You heard me. Your derby girl may not be interested in fixing cars or installing electronics around the house, but, even if she never touched a tool before, she needs some now. That’s right, now that she plays roller derby one of her most prized posessions is her roller skates. Roller skates are full of working parts and bolts and lock nuts, and a partridge in a pear tree. Depending on her plates (the metal ones on the bottom of her skates, not the dishes) she would probably appreciate a socket wrench, a set of Allen wrenches, preferably with handles, and a small adjustable wrench. Keeping skates in working condition is hard enough–make it easier for her and give her the right tools.
Though neoprene armbands with custom numbers are all the rage on the derby scene these days, it seems some derby girl, somewhere, is desperately in need of a marker. It could be to write her number on her arm, or it could be to make a last-minute scrimmage shirt. It could be to cross out an old number, to change a helmet… who knows. Roller derby is DIY and the clearest way to demarcate what needs marking is with a big fat Sharpie. Get her a half dozen and be confident they will get used.
Duct Tape or Duck Tape
Even if she takes excellent care of her derby gear, it will get messed up. It’s a rough sport out there, played on a hard surface. Duct Tape has been recognized for decades as a cheap, effective, and ugly way to fix just about anything. In response to the ugly factor, Duck Tape, just about as tough, comes in cute and colorful patterns. There are literally hundreds of Duck Tape variables to choose from. Pick something in her team color or that goes with her derby name and then she’ll look like she meant to have that strip of tape around each knee pad.
Epsom salt is an old-fashioned homeopathic remedy that really works. Any derby girl that doesn’t soak in an Epsom salt bath to ease muscle ache and strain certainly should. It will also neutralize foot odor…not that a derby girl would need that. Available in lavender scents, in small boxes, and in big ole vats it can all be put to good use.
Roller derby is the fastest growing female sport in the world. It’s also one of the most physically demanding sports a person can play. Requiring balance, agility, speed, strength, and smarts it’s no wonder a girl feels wiped out after practice. Besides excellent nutrition a derby girl must be constantly concerned with questions of hydration. It’s easy to forget about thirst, until it’s too late, and more than just water is being lost on the track. The simple solution is just that… a fizzy mix of minerals and water. A tiny potion taken once or twice a day will ensure that the body has all the electrolytes and minerals it needs. There are several choices on the market, usually sold in single serve packets. Trace Minerals offers an Electrolyte Stamina Power Pak in a dozen flavors, designed for athletes pushing themselves to the edge.
Nothing comes second to water. While nutritionists and health professionals don’t totally agree on the exact calculations of the perfect amount of water consumption for a person they agree that an athlete should drink more water and the amount an athlete should drink is a whole bunch, like gallons. A 200lb athlete should drink roughly 96 ounces a day. Some people love water and others find it hard to drink enough. The answer is Hydro Flask. Stainless steel, BPA free, it leaves water to its purest flavor (or lack there of). More importantly, Hydro Flask keeps water at temperature for 24 hours! Yes, that’s right. If you put ice water in your Hydro Flask, even if you leave it cooking in the car all day…the water will still be icy 24 hours later. Once you go Hydro Flask, you wonder how you ever drank from another container.